September 19, 2014: Once again, I brace myself for my least favorite holiday of the year: Talk Like a Pirate Day. I can’t quite explain why I hate it with the fire of a thousand suns, except maybe it’s because most people are so terrible at doing accents/voices, but they all think they do a great pirate voice. (Hint: they don’t.)

On a more favorable side, today is Butterscotch Pudding Day. Food Confessions time: I’ve never had butterscotch pudding. But I’ve had very little pudding overall, since it’s a texture that I have a very hard time with. (See also: cottage cheese, applesauce, whipped cream.) Finally, today is Jeans for Genes Day in the UK, so I hope all you limeys are rocking the denim today for a good cause.