Whenever I see the term “cold cuts,” my brain automatically supplies a picture of one of those pink oblong “pressed ham” things. That’s not even a cold cut I eat; it’s just what my brain helpfully supplies.

Also: don’t stick cotton swabs in your ears! (Despite the fact that they’re the perfect size and shape.) Though if you want to stick them in a pressed ham in the area where an ear would be if the ham had ears, go have fun.

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