Item the 1st: Do not drink cognac if you’re coaching cheer squads. Save the cognac for afterward.

Item the 2nd: TODAY I WILL EAT ALL THE CHEESE. WHAT A LOVELY DAY.

Item the 3rd: Sometimes I wonder what it looks like to Scott, when I twist my hands around in the air to try and figure out how to draw the fingers and thumb of a right hand holding a snifter of cognac. It must be pretty weird.

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