July 18, 2014: If you’re in the mood for something salty and fishy, have I got the perfect day for you: National Caviar Day! And this is turning out to be quite a week for Food Confessions, since I’ve never had caviar in my life. Everyone makes it out to be something fancy, but it just looks gross to me. It always makes me think of the giant fluorescent fish eggs we’d use as fishing bait when I was a kid. And hey, they’re still a thing! I fondly remember those little jars of Balls o’Fire.

It’s sparse pickings for daily holidays today, so I’m going with National Ventriloquism Week, this third week of July. We had a dummy when I was a kid, but I always found it kind of creepy. Although I’ve seen MUCH creepier ones since. They’re not as awful as clowns, but for me, they’re kind of close.